Since starting my job in 2002, I have been one of only 3 men to hold a job in my department. Out of 6 people in the department, I am currently the only male. The last guy Josh, quit in 2004 and I was sad to see him go. When he left, so did conversations of professional sports, action movies, cars, girl troubles, and your general mindless banter using funny accents. In it's place, talk about, well... everything - boyfriends, ex-boyfriends, myspace layouts, hair, nails, clothing and fake purses from China.
When Josh was around, there were no tears and and there was a lot less drama. There were fewer over-sharing infractions and zero instances of "girl problems." I also never had to preface a sentence with "I guess if I were a girl, I'd..."
Last Friday our department had a birthday lunch for one of team members. Again, me and 4 other girls. This time I talked even less and paid more attention to the conversation dynamics.
My conclusion - girls are different. They talk differently than men and relate to each other differently than men. This would have been a perfect case study for everything talked about in class. The weird thing about all this - I also noticed how in this situation I'd adapted to girl talk... I knew their rules and strangely followed along. It can also be said that they've "let me in."
But let it be known - I have my limits. Certain topics are untouchable and I'll be the first to remind you "we are at work."
Good night.
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3 comments:
That's got to be rough being the only guy at work. I'm not trying to be sexist here but most girls have a different sense of humor and like to talk about different things than guys do. It seems that in your situation the small talk that gets you through the work day is fairly limited.
I agree with you on the "women are different" part I mean it makes sense we are different biologically and physically. I can relate with you as well, I have worked at Bath and Body works twice over past Christmas vacations and it is like a whole new world being the only guy at a female dominated work place.
I can feel your pain on the subject of being included in the opposite sex's world. But do you think that maybe it wasn't so much the fact that you had two men working there instead of one or more you've given them signals that this behavior was okay and the other male never gave them the thumbs up?
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